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i would not burn the alexandrian library for you

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June 15th, 2005


04:14 pm - even more magic gun
- when pointed at impatient, speeding bus drivers, reminds them that the job they are paid for is to take passengers where they need to go, stop where the passengers need to stop, and not to make it from one end of their route to the other in the fastest possible time

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June 10th, 2005


01:04 pm - more magic gun
- when pointed at my gp, makes her tell the truth and make a sensible decision instantly instead of dithering for weeks and saying she'll "do some reading" i.e. she would say "i don't know what to do here. i'm going to refer you to someone who does."

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June 8th, 2005


11:49 am - quote of the year
Stupid endo. You go squish now.

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June 5th, 2005


06:09 pm - rescued


(i picked these buttercups before mowing the lawn yesterday. buttercups + sweetpeas + jasmine = summer. so would somebody tell the weather?)

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June 3rd, 2005


01:19 pm - magic gun continued
- delivers a resounding thwack to happyslappers, just as they are about to target their latest victim

- disrupts the signal to mobile phone users having loud conversations on public transport, particularly serial conversers

- flattens the batteries of personal stereos and iPods being played too loudly on public transport

- blows out the speakers of drivers who blare loud music while driving and cause the whole neighbourhood to throb with their bass

- safely stops and renders unridable excessively loud motorbikes in suburban areas, particularly at night and in the wee hours of the morning

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June 2nd, 2005


11:27 am - magic gun
- safely slows speeding cars to below the speed limit (unless they have a very good reason for speeding)

- does the same to police cars who are speeding just because they can

- drivers who persistently speed may find that, oops, their cars can no longer drive faster than the speed limit

- installs a huge poster on the back windscreen of cars who do not stop at pedestrian crossings which says “i break the highway code by not stopping. for pedestrians at zebra crossings. i am a bad driver.” this poster will not impede the driver’s vision and cannot be removed unless the driver changes their ways

- puts gracious words into the mouths of grumpy old people who seem to believe they are entitled to be rude and physically pushy just because they’re old. especially handy on buses, and has the added bonus of making grumpy old people say thank you if you give them your seat

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11:03 am - amusing italian words - part 1
uova - eggs

pronounced “ oo-oh-vah” or, spoken at normal speed “wova”. haha.

i burst out laughing in class when we did this word. then my (neapolitan) teacher did too. even to Italians, it’s a funny funny word.

i am so going to buy some uova next time i'm in sant'elia.

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May 28th, 2005


06:33 pm - nicked from adam
You Were Actually Born Under:
You are totally loyal, faithful, and honest.
However, you don't trust others to be as ethical as you are!
Straight forward and direct, you really aren't one for small talk.
You are a great listener - and an agreeable companion when you're in a good mood!

You are most compatible with a Tiger or Horse.
You Should Have Been Born Under:

You've got a ton of energy - and need plenty of room to roam.
You tend to follow your whims, and it's hard for you to stick to one thing.
Specific jobs, loves, and friends are always changing and never a part of your life for long.
Very intuitive, you tend to know what people are thinking before they say a word.

You are most compatible with a Dog or Tiger.

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06:23 pm
what a very good day.

gardening (including planting out the two blueberry bushes i bought), cleaning up the back garden and patio area in readiness for our bbq tonight, two loaves of corn & thyme bread baking in the oven, a bit of grocery shopping for tonight, a couple of loads of laundry done and hung out, and a short sojourn in starbucks reading the guardian weekend magazine. i even got one of the few armchairs-without-arms which sadly replaced the comfy purple sofas in their refurbishment.

and i only got up just over six hours ago.

now i can just look forward to a bbq dinner using apple twigs from our departed apple tree (gman, we've still got heaps! thanks again for your efforts 3(!) years ago) with our good friend peter, and raspberries and blueberries with gourmet icecream from waitrose (fig and orange blossom honey icecream - divine) for dessert.

(oh, and the sunshine definitely helps)

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May 21st, 2005


10:11 pm - gee thanks lou!
1) Total number of books I own:

200+ but used to own a lot more. i no longer keep a book unless i think i'll want to read it again or refer to it. i sell books on amazon or give them away. i have been known to leave books on buses and tubes in the hopes they'll get a new reader.

2) The last book I bought:

I have bought about 10 books in the last month. One of the last batch was Paul Auster's Oracle Night

3) The last book I read:

My Friend Leonard by James Frey

I am currently reading:

A Life Stripped Bare by Leo Hickman (definitely worth reading, lots of really good tips on how to live in a more ethical manner)
Secret Smile by Nicci French
The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler


4) Five books that mean a lot to me:

Guide to Life by Dorothy Rowe
Gas Smells Awful by Helen Razer
The Journals of Sylvia Plath
Heavy Water by Mario Petrucci
He Died With A Felafel In His Hand by John Birmingham


5) Tag 5 people and have them fill this out in their ljs:

soshesays
gmangod
sarawr
suessigkeiten
touchyphiliac

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